Goal: be clear about your personal values and about the shared house values

Just Getting Started?

With a friend or two, meet regularly to discuss your ideas about what you want for yourself in a house, and what you hope to create together.   hint: Eating together during this process can plant seeds for great things to develop!

Questions to ask while considering whether    and how to live collectively:


Values discussion: what would be your ideal living situation? What will help you thrive?
What are your deal-breakers: things that you are not willing to live with?
Eating together: Do you want to eat meals together, and how frequently? Do you own food in common? Like what?
What is the social culture of the house: Do you party all night? Do you use intoxicants? Does everybody like to be quiet in the evenings and be in bed by 11pm?
Timing:when do you want to start a house, and in what part of town?

Sharing food is often a big issue for people, with many many details to work out.

We think it is one of the most important considerations about living together, and perhaps the one thing with biggest potential to strengthen your community literally and poetically. Is it processed, is it local? Is it from a can, is it raw? Do we eat dinner together regularly, even nightly? See the Section about sharing food, both WHEN and WHAT.

Further topics to discuss, as relevant to your situation:

  • Costs and attitudes about money,
  • Resident ages and kids,
  • Communication and house meetings,
  • Housework and chores,
  • Common spaces,
  • Queer-friendliness and other inclusivities,
  • Quiet times,
  • TV,
  • Gardening,
  • Transportation,
  • Pets,
  • Allergies,
  • Substances,
  • Projects,
  • Guests,
  • Amount of personal-time-contribution-to-house-projects.


Published on January 30, 2011 at 7:28 pm  Comments Off on Forming